I Changed My Mind, I Think 90 Day Fiancé’s Amani Jlassi Is Actually The Problem In The “Throuple” (She’s Purposely Hurting Her Husband Matt)

90 Day Fiancé‘s resident “throuple”—Matt and Amani Jlassi, and Hany “Any” Aguirre—have struggled with their unconventional relationship, and the more time goes on, the more I’m convinced that Amani is actually the issue. Amani and Matt, from San Diego, had been together for 10 years when they decided to bring in a third partner, Any, whom they met on vacation in Mexico. Matt, Amani, and Any had been in a “throuple” for about a year before cameras began following their story on 90 Day Fiancé season 11. They are the first “throuple” to be featured on the series.

90 Day Fiancé has exposed audiences to many types of relationships, some more traditional, and some less so. Matt, Amani, and Any’s relationship definitely qualifies as non-traditional.

Any lives in Tijuana, which is just a short distance from San Diego, but in an entirely different country. The only way to bring Any to the U.S. is for Matt and Amani to get legally divorced, so one can marry Any and bring her over on a K-1 visa.

Amani Got Jealous Of Any And Matt’s Relationship

They Had To Establish Rules

If traditional relationships are complicated, polyamorous ones can be extra complicated. The individuals involved need to have clear rules and firm boundaries, which Matt, Amani, and Any failed to do before their Mexican vacation. Early in the trip, Amani discovered that Matt and Any had been intimate without her. She’d gone to bed, and the two were physical, thinking there wouldn’t be any issues, since they were all together on the trip.

Amani became jealous of Matt and Any’s intimate experience because she wasn’t involved in it, and she wasn’t aware of it. She didn’t give them permission, which is apparently something important to Amani. I would think that this is something they would have discussed by now, but they hadn’t.

I would think that if someone were going to take part in a “throuple,” they would know whether they were the jealous type or not.

I have a theory that Amani is secretly competitive with Matt. Amani is the breadwinner in their family, and Matt appears to be a stay-at-home dad. I think Amani’s domineering personality is partly because she’s competitive with Matt. When Any and Matt crossed a boundary for Amani, she got extremely upset, and made them feel like they’d done something wrong. This ended up being the impetus for them to establish some rules for their relationship, which should have happened already, but better late than never?

Amani Told Matt That Any Loves Her More Than Him

Amani Threw A Temper Tantrum

Amani said she felt like things were starting to go more in favor of Matt, which proves to me that she is competing with him for Any’s affections. Amani is keeping score, saying that Any introduced Matt as her boyfriend, and she kissed Matt first when they all met. Amani’s motives might be less about being with Any, and more about her underlying issues with Matt.

“There’s a growing closeness between them that worries me.”

After Amani found out about Any and Matt’s tryst, she became more defensive and more jealous. She started creating conflict, first by saying that Any wasn’t taking her seriously in the relationship, and then by throwing a tantrum at a winery where they were all enjoying dinner.

Any tried to console Amani, but she said in a confessional that Amani’s reaction scared her. When Any ended up telling Amani that she didn’t care about Matt, and that she loved Amani more than she loved Matt, Amani looked relieved. Despite feeling insecure about Matt and Any, Amani sighed and said, “That’s kind of the problem,” when Any said she had more feelings for Amani than Matt.

Amani’s comment confused me. She’s feeling insecure, yet she says the problem is that Any cares too much about her?

This feels like it will be a problem for the “throuple” moving forward.

Amani Blamed Matt For Withdrawing After She Hurt Him

Amani Couldn’t Wait To Tell Matt What Any Said

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Amani seemed almost giddy to hear that Any had stronger feelings for her than she did for Matt. She didn’t tell Matt for a couple of days, though. However, from my perspective, she seemed excited to tell him.

She wants Matt to be focused on her more than Any, and she wants Any to be more focused on her than Matt.

Amani told Matt that Any said that she was only in the relationship for Amani, and doesn’t feel the same way about Matt as she does about Amani. Amani slightly misconstrued Any’s words, since Any said she cared about Amani more than Matt, but Any didn’t say that she was only there for Matt. Any might love Amani more, but she still has love for Matt.

I think Amani exaggerated Any’s words because she wanted to make Matt feel jealous and insecure, just like she’d been feeling. In a “throuple,” all three partners must be attuned to each other’s feelings. There can’t be jealousy and game-playing. I’m concerned that, for Amani, this is more about winning than it is about being in a healthy relationship.

90 Day Fiancé airs Sundays at 8 p.m. EDT on TLC.

90 Day Fiancé

Release Date

January 12, 2014

Network

TLC

Showrunner

Kyle Hamley

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  Sophie Sierra

  Self – Host

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